Sunday
Today Mom was feisty. She was sleeping when I arrived, so I went about straightening up her apartment. She must have been up most of the night, by the looks of her room—-she’d ‘cleaned up’ almost every cupboard, drawer, and shelf! After going through as much of the room as I could, I still can’t find the remote for her television or her third room key. I’m going to try to avoid getting yet another key. I’m positive she’s found some new place to squirrel things away, but I haven’t found it yet. I’ve shown her how to use the television without the remote, but I doubt she’ll remember. If that doesn’t show up in the next few days I’ll probably get her a new universal remote as part of her Christmas. I kept trying to get her up, and eventually coerced her out of bed. She rolled into the bathroom about 10:30, saying she better hurry or she might miss breakfast. I told her they stopped serving almost three hours ago, but I’d be glad to get her some coffee while she got dressed. She thought that was a good idea, so I went off for coffee, and when I got back she was still sitting in her bathroom, having not moved an inch. I asked her to get dressed, and she could have some coffee, and she did cooperate with me. She came out a little before 11, and was putting on her shoes when Lynn called. Lynn was talking to me, but I could see Mom’s face registering impatience. She finally burst out with ‘if I don’t get down there soon, I won’t get any breakfast!’ I told her it was too late for breakfast, they were getting ready for lunch. I talked to Lynn a few more minutes, and I could see Mom’s brain starting to work through the logic, and pretty soon she rolled into the kitchenette, poured her coffee down the sink, and headed out the apartment door. When I asked where she was going, she told me she was going to lunch! I told her it was a little too early, and brought her back into the room and suggested Lynn talk to her before she took off again. Mom talked to her for a few minutes and then made an excuse to hand the phone back to me. I talked to Lynn a few more minutes, and Mom managed to hook the leg of her plant stand with her wheelchair and started pulling it across the room with her, yanking the timer plug out of the wall. When the lights went out, she looked confused and then rolled over and flipped on the overhead lights. She continued to try to ‘go to lunch’; even though she told me she wasn’t really hungry. Between several more attempts to escape, she’d fidget in her chair, or take a few catnaps. It was a very odd morning, but at least she was in a fairly decent mood. She was happy when I left.
Monday
Mom was sleeping when I arrived, so I went about laying out her clothes for the day. Mom scared me when she yelled out ‘what are you doing!!’ After I got over being startled, I tried to keep the mood light, and told her I was just getting her out clean clothes to put on. She woke up pretty quickly and actually seemed pretty clear-minded today. She wanted to doze off and on for another 30 minutes, but eventually did get up. I made her bed while she got cleaned up and dressed for the day. She asked me lots of questions about family members and we chatted for the rest of the morning. This was the first really good morning she’s had for a very long time. She was very contented when I left at noon.
Tuesday
Mom was just finishing up her shower when I arrived today. She was in good spirits. I changed the sheets on her bed, and put fresh towels in her bathroom. It looked like she’d been ‘cleaning up’ last night——a number of her dead violets (due to lack of water) were gone, there was a stack of pots next to her sink, a bag of dirt behind her door, and dirt debris all over her floor. When I mentioned she must have been cleaning out her flowers, she denied it, saying someone must have stolen them. When I pointed out the pots on her sink and the dirt on the floor, she started fussing about the mess ‘they’ made when they took her flowers! I redirected her by reminding her housekeeping would be in soon to vacuum, so she didn’t have to worry about it. Within 15 minutes the staff was there to clean up, so I took Mom out to one of the conversation areas in the hallway to get out of their way. We talked for a while, but pretty quickly she dropped off to sleep. I just sat with her for a while. When it got closer to noon, I went back to her room to get my coat. Her room was spick-and-span, and smelt like cinnamon 
I went back and engaged mom in conversation, trying to wake her up before lunchtime. She seemed fine when I left.
Wednesday
Mom was sleeping when I arrived, and showed no desire to get up. I checked in with her every 15 minutes or so, but she ‘just wanted to sleep a little more’. Finally I got tired of twiddling my thumbs, and about 11 left, telling Mom I’d see her tomorrow. She wasn’t upset or angry, just sleepy. Hopefully she’ll get well rested.
Thursday
Mom was still sleeping when I arrived. I picked up her room, and found she’d managed to soil 4 pairs of pants yesterday, so apparently it hadn’t been a very good day. I noticed a strong urine odor, but wasn’t sure where it was coming from. I was laying out her clothes when she started to wake up, and talked with me. She seemed cheerful if a bit sleepy. she told me she wanted to sleep a while longer, so I left her alone until about 11. Then I went in and pushed again to try to get her up for lunch. She decided she was hungry enough to want to get up. I checked her wheelchair to straighten out the wheels and knew I’d found the source of the odor—-I picked up the cushion on her chair, and found the chair itself was wet! So I scrubbed down the cushion and put it in her bathroom to dry, and then scrubbed down the chair itself. At least she won’t be sitting in a wet spot all day! I got her up and into the bathroom, and then made her bed while she got dressed and ready for the day. She came out into the living room and left the water running full blast in her bathroom sink, so I went in there to shut it off. I wonder how often this happens—it must play havoc with their water bill! Mom was in a chipper mood, and we chatted amiably until it was time for lunch. She was cheerful and bubbly when I left.
My heart always sinks when I see ‘Homestead’ pop up on my phone ID because I know It’s either Mom on a tear or the nurse telling me something has happened. This time when the phone rang at 8 pm it was Mom. She was all excited, and told me the nurse told her she was being discharged tomorrow, and would I take her home? If I couldn’t, she’d have to call Bill to come and get her. I tried to rationally explain this to her, but she was just getting perturbed with me. She didn’t care if her house was sold, or if her father’s house was sold, or that she didn’t know where she was going, but by God she wasn’t going to stay here one more day, and if I wouldn’t help her, she was going to get Bill to come get here! I finally told her to go ahead, because I couldn’t help her. She hung up on me. I worried about her all night.
Friday
I was worried what I would find when I arrived today. I found Mom sound asleep, and she didn’t respond to my talking to her at all. I found some of her clothes packed and ready to go, so I quietly put everything away. I put out clothes for her to put on when she got up, and realized she’d actually slept in her clothes from yesterday. The worst thing I saw was that her wall quilt had been ripped down —- one of the bulldog hooks was pulled completely out of the wall. One of the hanging loops on the back of the quilt was still hanging on the wall on the remaining bulldog hook. The dowel rods that held it rigid were pulled out and the thrown on her floor. I found the quilt itself grasped in her hands. It really saddened me. I talked with the staff and found out Mom went to bed no earlier than 3 am. They tried every couple of hours to get her to put on her nightgown and go to bed, but she continually refused. We decided if she was sleeping that soundly it was probably best to let her sleep. I hope she wakes up in better spirits than when she went to sleep.
Saturday
Today was no better than yesterday. Mom was in bed when Heather and I arrived, and was having an animated conversation with someone we couldn’t see. I told her I brought her company, and when she asked me who was here, I told her Heather. She responded, ‘what about the weather?’ and I repeated, no, HEATHER was here. Mom woke up enough to say hello, ask her how she was, and then said ‘Goodbye’. We both looked at each other, and went back out into the living room. We stayed for about 20 minutes, and then tried again. Mom wouldn’t even open her eyes. She told me she wanted to sleep more. So we told her goodbye, and left. I talked to the staff on the way out, and they said she’d also refused to take her pills, telling them to bring it in later. She again was sleeping in yesterday’s clothes. They told me they’d keep checking on her and see if they could get her up for lunch. I do hope she gets up sometime today.
